When the Light Is Out But You're Too Stressed to Notice

When all my family was here last weekend, Ryan decided we should introduce Hannah to First Monday. We loaded into two cars and headed out. I was in the lead car with Ryan and Hannah. My niece, Katie, sister (Cookie), and kids were in the car behind us. 

We hadn't driven far before my sister texted me to let me know my tail lights were out. No brake lights. Nothing. They had already diagnosed my problem. Either a fuse or a short.

My lights had gone out, and I was completely clueless.

It took me a few days to get to my mechanic's shop when it was open. I dreaded the visit. I had visions of expensive repairs to correct the problem.

As it turns out, the cause of my lightlessness was not a fuse or a short. Both light bulbs had burned out. It only cost $15 to repair. 

This morning, I pondered the lights-out situation and wondered how long the problem existed before I knew about it. No one flagged me down to tell me. No one mentioned it after I got out of my car. I never thought to check them.

When you don't see your own light, how do you know it's gone?

We're supposed to be the light of the world, but what if we don't know our light's out (or dimmed)? If people can't "see" our light, all our words are pointless. 

Yesterday was one of those rare days when I was at the end of my rope. The expectations for what I "should" do far exceeded the reality of what I could do. I did what I was "supposed" to do, which meant I couldn't do what I thought God had called me to do. 

I was already stretched too thin...I spent the day fighting back tears and struggling with exhaustion. I wanted to lash out at the people who weren't exhausted and overwhelmed. I hate to admit it, but I resented their cheerfulness. 

Those not-much-like-Jesus feelings were a good indicator that my soul-light was dimmed nearly out.

I should've stayed home. 

My light wasn't extinguished completely, but it was so dim as to be impossible to see. Exhaustion will do that. Especially emotional exhaustion.

Today, I'm making a different decision. I've already had my quiet time, studied my Bible, gone through my prayer list. 

For the rest of my day, I'm doing what I know I must, those things that only I can do, and I'm doing them in order of priority. I'm taking Sam to the grocery store, helping him settle down for the day, finishing novel edits. I may or may not try to cut my grass. I may, or may not, pull weeds. 

Today, first things will be first.

The most important thing has already happened. I've given my lights-nearly-out-in-my-soul problem to the Light Giver, God Himself. I've asked Him to bring the kind of refreshment that rekindles the flame and helps it burn brighter. I've surrendered the good and embraced the best.

I don't quite know what to do about all the challenges I face, but I know Who does. I know He'll give me wisdom when I need it.

I'm surely not the only one who pushes until near collapse, who faces problems too big for them...If you're in that fragile place of dim-lighted illumination, take heart. Our God is light, and He longs to give His light to us, His light-bearers...Why not take your failing light to Him and allow Him to rekindle the flame and restore the glow?

"In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. And the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it." John 1:4,5 nasb
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Please like and share if this blog post has touched your heart. It extends our digital reach in significant ways. Thank you.

In case you missed it, here's the link to yesterday's post: When God Mandates Rest and We Refuse to Comply

If you feel led to partner with this ministry (US, Jordan, the digital world), here's the link to give your tax-deductible donations: Global Outreach Acct 4841 

Or you can mail your check or money order to: Global Outreach/ PO Box 1, Tupelo MS 38802. Be sure to put Account 4841 in the "for" line

When God Mandates Rest and We Refuse to Comply

I'm not sure when I first stumbled upon the idea of zany holidays, but I embraced them with great enthusiasm. When Ryan was growing up, we celebrated everything from the color blue to Pi to National Hot Dog Day, and many things in between.

This morning, I looked at the Holiday Insights website for new ideas. Today is both Chocolate Day and National Strawberry Sundae Day, both holidays worth celebrating. I just missed National Fried Chicken Day and International Kissing Day (both yesterday). Tomorrow is National Blueberry Day. (Hence the photo of the blueberry pound cake above) 

I love the idea of celebrating, but I'm not sure I'll take the time to commemorate these particular days.

Celebration, however, is a Biblical principle, and one I've not been as good about following in recent years. Scripture describes eight festivals a year for the nation of Israel to follow. Most of them are several days (or a week) in length. No work. Feasting. Celebrating. Joy. Community. Fun. All mandated by God. 

Selah.

Pause to consider that bit of truth for a moment. 

In the law, God specifically instructed His people to take more than a month's worth of festival days filled with feasting, celebration, and community. Every one of those days is a day of rest, in addition to the weekly Sabbath day. 

As I counted feast days, I attempted to do a quick "rest day" count... 52 Sabbaths a year, three of those (at least) falling on festival days. Thirty three festival days. That's more than 80 days of rest, no matter how you figure it. 22% of the year. One in five days. At least..

That's a lot of fun, and a lot of rest.

I don't always see God as a party-God, but maybe I should.

In recent years, I've celebrated less and worked more. After two hard days of editing, I'm in the home stretch. Yesterday, I worked from 5 am until 10:30pm with very few breaks in between. I'm 75% through the edits (mostly changing a few sections written in first person back to third person). When I finally finish the edits and proposal and hit send, I'll want to celebrate. And I should. 

Here's a true confession: I probably won't. 

Today, I'm reconsidering the importance of both rest and celebration. If God says to do it, why don't we? 

I'm not sure why, and I'm not sure our reasons matter. What's important is not defending our disobedience, but learning to obey. 

Every festival God ordained had a point. It wasn't merely rest; the people of Israel were to celebrate the provision of God. At the end of harvest, they celebrated the increase God had given. At Passover, they celebrated the provision God had made for sin. At Purim, they celebrated His miraculous deliverance from massacre. 

Every holiday was, in some way, a celebration of the goodness and generosity of God. Even the Sabbath was a celebration of the truth that God could do in six days what was utterly impossible for mere man. 

If 22% of the year is supposed to be for rest and celebrating God, when will we start? 

Why not begin today?

Let's be intentional about spending time celebrating the goodness of God today, as if we had a mini-holiday to commemorate. Because we do. 22% of a 24 hour day is 5.3 hours...Friends, we have plenty of time to celebrate God today, so let's get started.

For what goodness and generosity of God are you thanking Him today? What are you celebrating?

"Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy..." Exodus 20:8 nasb

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Please like and share if this blog post has touched your heart. It extends our digital reach in significant ways. Thank you.

In case you missed it, here's the link to yesterday's post: When Doing Means Finishing What You've Started

If you feel led to partner with this ministry (US, Jordan, the digital world), here's the link to give your tax-deductible donations: Global Outreach Acct 4841 

Or you can mail your check or money order to: Global Outreach/ PO Box 1, Tupelo MS 38802. Be sure to put Account 4841 in the "for" line

#celebrate

When Doing Means Finishing What You Started

I intended to take the entire week to do what God has been wearing me out about not doing. Instead, I have two days, but this time, I'm taking next week and the next if needed.

When God says do something, you have to do it. Especially if it takes you a while to get to the doing.

Back in 2014, I took a break from medicine for a few months to finish a couple of writing projects. I never went back. 

I finished The Waiting: When the Answer to Your Prayers is Delayed and Your Hope is Gone. I wasn't happy with the back cover, so I never actively marketed the book. You can't judge a book by it's cover, and it's nowhere truer than with that book. I'm delighted with the front cover and the inside. If you haven't read it, I recommend it. (You can follow the link to my online store)

Before I finished the first project, I had started a second. My first novel. God gave me the story. He gave me the help I needed to hone my fiction skills. He molded the story into a better form, then molded it again, over and over. 

Within a year, the book had placed in the top three in a national fiction-writing competition. I was on my way. Or so I thought.

I hired a well-known editor to help me polish the story and learn what I needed to know. It has taken me nearly two years to get it done. Truthfully, I abandoned the process when I went to Global last summer. There wasn't time for everything, and I struggled to get the new ministry up and going. I couldn't do it all. 

I could have continued to work at it on the weekends, but I didn't. Not really.

I'm on the final edit now and it's hard. I want it to be right. I want readers to stay up at night to finish the book. I want them to save their copy and pick it up again over the years because they love the characters. I want it to be the "go to" fiction when a reader wants to read something they love.

Yeah. Big dreams.

Dreams never become reality, however, unless you do the work required. Not long ago, I wrote about the Shouting Scripture. In the last few weeks, James 1:22 has worn me out. "Doer = Author," it screams. 

I get it. 

I posted the verse on my office whiteboard. I recounted it every day. I scheduled time to write. 

I'm finally doing it. 

Yesterday, I announced to Sam that I was taking an office day at my computer. "I guess that means leave you alone, right?" When Sam is bored or worried or afraid or has scary symptoms, he comes to me, and I want him to do that. 

On writing day, however, it usually means repeated interruptions. When I'm in the middle of a sentence or a thought, that interruption may mean the sentence or the thought is gone forever.

"Leave you alone..." Put that way, I wasn't sure what to say. Finally, I said what I meant. "It really does, Sam. If you definitely need me, call. If not, I'm writing until at least 4 pm. It's the same as if I'm at the office. I'm out of reach unless you need me." 

Sam sighed and complied. He only interrupted my writing once when he was worried and afraid about his symptoms. I talked him through and he went back home to eat and rest.

I made it to the half-way point yesterday. I'm taking another day to write today. This time, I'm being obedient all the way to the end.

Last week, I gathered supplies and packed care bags for homeless people. Being a doer, this week, means sitting at the computer and pressing on as I complete the edits, make corrections, and fine-tune the work God's given me. 

Doing, for you, may mean something entirely different. Regardless, we must be about our Father's business, so stop delaying and get going on whatever God has impressed you to do.

Be more than a hearer on a pew. Be a doer who takes what's heard and puts it into action.

"Be doers of the word, and not hearers only..." James 1:22  

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Please like and share if this blog post has touched your heart. It extends our digital reach in significant ways. Thank you.

In case you missed it, here's the link to yesterday's post: How God Used Jumping Hay Bales to Meet My Needs

If you feel led to partner with this ministry (US, Jordan, the digital world), here's the link to give your tax-deductible donations: Global Outreach Acct 4841 

Or you can mail your check or money order t

o: Global Outreach/ PO Box 1, Tupelo MS 38802. Be sure to put Account 4841 in the "for" line.
#writerslife 

How God Used Jumping Hay Bales to Meet My Needs

Last week, the man I've bought hay from for years called. Hay would be ready on Friday. I needed 75 square bales for my horses, so we set up a time to pick up the hay in the field. It's hard work, but a better price, so it's worth it. 

An unforeseen event, a broken truck, and an overloaded trailer prevented a Friday pick-up. I'd prayed without ceasing about what I should do. It looked to me as if I should cancel on the hay, but I hated to go back on my word. 

Before I could call my Hay Man, he called me. 

It was Thursday and bad weather was threatening. He had decided to bale early to avoid the rain. "Can you come on and get this hay now?"

"No way. I have the packing party tonight. I have a ton to do. I can't do it today." We rescheduled for 45 days hence, and I got back to work.

Saturday afternoon, I had a call from Hay Man. "You need to go on up to your wood fence because a guy was hauling hay from me and two of the bales fell off and rolled through your fence."

Ryan and I jumped in the car and headed to the road. Just as he'd said, two large round hay bales had become loose on the trailer and rolled off, straight into my fence. Two posts were knocked over, and boards were loose or on the ground.

The man hauling the hay was apologetic. He offered to give me the hay and repair the fence. We moved one of the bales, but the other one was too heavy for my tractor. It was no problem, he assured me. He'd move it himself.

Yesterday was fence-repair-day. 

As it turned out, the very hay I'd intended to buy was delivered to the farm at no charge. I didn't have to pick it up in the field. I didn't have to hire help. I didn't have to haul it. 

The fence I'd been worried about, because a board was loose in the very area the hay hit, is now repaired and is better than ever.

In an odd series of events, God met the needs I had no way of meeting in the most unexpected way, and with a much better outcome than I could have orchestrated myself. 

Late yesterday, I looked at my repaired fence in wonder. It's tangible evidence that God will provide. Whether hay needs, hauling needs, or fence repair needs, God knows and has a plan. 

I've seen that truth in a fresh way this weekend, and it's left me awed and humbled. 

He knows my need. It's almost mind-boggling, but it's true. Even more remarkable, He knows and is willing to meet those needs, and He has.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.'" Jeremiah 29:11 nasb

It's my life verse and I've seen the truth of it in a fresh way this weekend. The next time I have a problem I can't solve, I hope I remember this verse and the jumping hay that met so many of my needs.

What about you? How has God met your needs in unexpected ways? I'd love to hear, so please share below.
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Please like and share if this blog post has touched your heart. It extends our digital reach in significant ways. Thank you.

In case you missed it, here's the link to yesterday's post: Buying Rancid When Fresh is Only A Step Away

If you feel led to partner with this ministry (US, Jordan, the digital world), here's the link to give your tax-deductible donations: Global Outreach Acct 4841 

Or you can mail your check or money order t

o: Global Outreach/ PO Box 1, Tupelo MS 38802. Be sure to put Account 4841 in the "for" line.

#godwillprovide

Buying Rancid When Fresh is Only a Step Away

Ryan, Hannah, and I were on the way back to the farm from a shopping expedition. I had stocked my 'fridge with healthy foods that included turkey sausage and fresh fruit, but Ryan wanted ribs. We stopped by a grocery I hadn't visited in years and found a surprising array of foods.

Not far from the red pepper hummus was a plastic bin with a hand-lettered sign offering "rancid fatback" for sale. In case you're wondering, "rancid" fatback is old, stale fatback that both smells bad and tastes bad. 

The three of us stared at that bin in astonishment. "Why would anyone buy this, Miss Leanna?" Hannah asked. 

"I have no idea," I told her. 

Ryan looked across the aisle at the meat coolers. "If you step across the aisle, you can get not-rancid fatback, so... why buy rancid?" 

No one had an answer, but the question has stayed with me for the last two days. 

Why buy rancid?

If you've read this blog for a while, you know I had to dig a bit... The Hebrew word for "rancid" is ba'ash, and is used 31 times in Scripture. One of the first verses I found was from Ecclesiastes:

"One dead fly makes the perfumer's ointment give off a rancid stench, so a little folly can outweigh much wisdom." Ecclesiastes 10:1 net

It's a sad truth that all the wisdom in the world can be undone and rendered doubtful by even a "little" sin. That's why it's so important to choose righteousness and repent quickly.

The writer of Proverbs stated the situation in clear terms:

"The righteous hate what is false, but the wicked make themselves a stench and bring shame on themselves." Probers 13:5 niv

Here's the Leanna paraphrase:

When we indulge ourselves in a life of sin, we smell like rancid fatback to God, so make a better choice. A cleansed heart is only one step, one bent knee of repentance away. 

Rancid fatback. It's not a smell I enjoy. It's not something I want to use for cooking, and it's sure not a smell I want to embrace.  

We have a choice - choose Christ's righteousness and a sweet smelling savor or choose the evil one's sin and a rancid fatback stench. Phew. 

I choose Christ. How about you?

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Please like and share if this blog post has touched your heart. It extends our digital reach in significant ways. Thank you.

In case you missed it, here's the link to yesterday's post: How Annabelle Became Andy and the Importance of Truth

If you feel led to partner with this ministry (US, Jordan, the digital world), here's the link to give your tax-deductible donations: Global Outreach Acct 4841 

Or you can mail your check or money order to: Global Outreach/ PO Box 1, Tupelo MS 38802. Be sure to put Account 4841 in the "for" line.

How Annabelle Became Andy and the Importance of Truth

When my niece, Katie, arrived at dusk with my new pig in a crate, we hauled the crate to the stall and opened the door. New Pig was a little hesitant about the strange surroundings and refused to come out without encouragement. We cajoled and made promises of nice piggy-treats to come. No movement. Finally, we tilted the crate over and forced her out. 

"She's gonna be so happy here," Katie assured me.

"I love this spotted pig already," I announced. "I'm naming her Annabelle." We all agreed it was a great name. We checked the newly-made automatic waterer and feeder and headed back to the house. 

Katie has dealt with farm animals all her life. I assumed she'd checked the gender, so I didn't. She hadn't. 

Annabelle had been here for nearly forty-eight hours when an observant friend said words I didn't want to hear. "I hate to tell you this, but Annabelle's not female."

I looked at Katie. "I thought you said this pig was a girl."

She shrugged. "You're a doctor. Can't you tell?"

I hadn't even bothered  to look. I had assumed that what Katie said about the pig was true.

There are many directions I could go with this, but I'm skipping the obvious and considering the importance of checking facts for ourselves. I believed what was said about the pig. I never once considered verifying what I'd heard.  

For two days, I responded on the basis of the faulty information I believed. It didn't make any difference to the pig, of course. When we embrace faulty information about our fellow humans, however, it can make a bigger difference than we intend.

Rumors can spread like wildfire, taking a few twists along the way. By the time the rumor reaches our ears, what we hear can be so far from truth as to be laughable. 

When we respond on the basis of rumors and innuendo, we risk marking someone with the paintbrush of lies, some of which are worse than indelible ink. The stain they leave behind lasts for years.

What's even worse is to believe false rumors about God. "God wants us to be happy." "He wants us to prosper." "Name it and claim it and it will be yours." "God loves you too much to allow you to be unhappy." Those words all sound good, but they aren't true. We need look no further than the life of Jesus to be sure.

God wants us to be content, holy, righteous. He won't waste suffering, but will use it to make us more like Him. These truths, straight from Scripture, paint a vastly different picture of God and the disciple-life than does the prosperity gospel.

We serve a God who loves us and helps us through the mess sin has made of the world. That's our truth.

Annabelle isn't female. That changes his future, and mine, in ways we'll discuss later. 

Truth will do that. It sets us free, but only if we know it and we let it.

"Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." John 8:32 niv 

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Please like and share if this blog post has touched your heart. It extends our digital reach in significant ways. Thank you.

In case you missed it, here's the link to yesterday's post: When It's Time to Leave the Snake-Life Behind

If you feel led to partner with this ministry (US, Jordan, the digital world), here's the link to give your tax-deductible donations: Global Outreach Acct 4841 

Or you can mail your check or money order to: Global Outreach/ PO Box 1, Tupelo MS 38802. Be sure to put Account 4841 in the "for" line.